Emotional awareness and hearty applause

by Emma

Today has been an emotionally exhausting day. I feel like I have been on an exhilarating ride to then simply crash in a muddy pond.

I question myself alot. I question others equally. I question my own integrity, and I further ponder my own truth. I know that I continously seek clarity in situations, but find frustration in the lack of control that we sometimes have. I typically wear my heart on my sleeve. It is dangerous and highly risky. Yet to hold it too tight, risks it shrivelling and becoming ‘lost in transition’. It also removes my emotion. It’s a no win situation.

I often ponder the irony of the defined ‘ice queen’. Surely if she lived in a world of zero temperature, then she would be used to the cold…Both physically and emotionally. Whoever lived beside her would be climatised also. So to consider her an ice queen is surely just normalising her existence. It’s hardly offensive. Just saying.

In sharp contrast, my personality could be defined and compared to a hotter climate. I personally hate winter and I loathe the cold. Yet at times, I envy that queen.

I thrive in optimism. I love positivity. I also love self-awareness. Tonight I’m embracing my own negativity. I cannot let it rot, or slowly grow. I will allow it centre stage. I will give it an audience. Only tonight. Then it needs to be heckled right back off.

Tomorrow the sun will shine. Tomorrow clarity will be within reach.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…