A helping hand

I have been working with a young anorexic girl today. She is in hospital at the moment due to extreme weight loss and ill health. She is 14.

During my time with her, she was exercising non stop and counting every calorie. She was also non-stop questioning me on weight loss.

She cried and begged us to make her stop. She was internally struggling with her own logic, but also the coercion of her ‘anorexic voice’. Yet, with the exception of physical restraint, we were unable to do this.

Therapy begins with the acknowledgement of a problem, followed by therapy, aimed at changing a cognition, and a behaviour. In eating disorders, it begins with an admission, and it starts with an emotional and psychological war. It is emotionally distressing for the individual, and also for their friends and families. It is natural to want to support your loved one, yet the family need to take on the role of the guard and enforcer, to offer them appropriate care and safeguarding.

I spent time with her and we talked about her fears, her anxieties, her irrational cognitions. It is a long and hard journey but it is fundamental. I have personal experience of this. I was this 14 year old and I fought my own demons.

I won.

A mental health problem is not just a hidden stigma. It is not just something which a select few suffer from. It really can happen to any of us. It is distressing. It is heartbreaking. However, there is a positive destination. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

Support, compassion, and comprehension really do make a difference. Everybody can help.

We all simply just need to hold out a hand.

Really that is all it takes.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Soap box, labelling, and opinionated defiance

I am going to stand on my soap box and preach.

I feel the need to vent, and you, my blogging peers, get the honour of hearing my complaints :p

I hate the word ‘diagnosis’. It is simply a definition of ‘label’. Furthermore it excuses mannerism and basic human compassion. It breeds patronising behaviour, and honours rigid thinking.

I work with people who are diagnosed, and people who are presumed diagnosed. These people are simply people WITH an added condition. They are NOT a condition. Nor should they be known by it.

Autistic

Manic depressive

Schizophrenic

Seriously? These individuals have the diagnosis. They are not the illness.

I also hate the way that a diagnosis appears to infringe on basic etiquette and human decency. The label seems to encourage people to disregard rudeness and minimise their individual opinions.

I observe people talking over individuals, talking about them as if they were not in the vicinity, and demoralising them. The ignorance is amazing.

So I will quietly stand down from my soap box now, but I will remain aghast that our knowledgeable and developing society is so prehistoric that prejudice and discrimination continues to breed. Personally I think it says more about the people than the ones diagnosed.

Maybe they need a diagnosis of ignorance and uneducated stance, or a lesson in respect, dignity, and humanity.

Just saying 🙂

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Deeper I fall

Night is the time to ponder. I lay in the dark, only the light from my phone warming the chilled room. I think.

I do try not to think. Sometimes thought is simply exhausting. Sometimes, I would prefer to simply be. I am too deep for my own good at times. I analyse, I question. At work, that is a necessity. It is valued. I value it. At night, it is a hindrance. My body craves sleep. My mind craves stimulation.

There is no off switch.

So I surrender to the need. I drift off in a spiral of cognitive mass. It seeps into my dreams, it creates complex visioning.

It also creates a personal funneling to self awareness. The more we question our external world, the closer we become to our internal voice. To knowing our muse.

I know that the daylight will once again encourage the pondering and inquisitive notion. Dreams will become filed in my minds eye, for later analysis. A new day and a new conundrum will begin.

The irony is that we will never find the answers. The constant philosophical questions will forever remain a mystery. However, the inspiration will remain.

So I will sit. I will ponder. I will analyse. I will continue to use my brain creatively. I will continue to enjoy, question, enjoy some more. I will give my mind the stimulation it desires, and I will continue to learn.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Weekly musings and life’s lessons

This week I learnt a few things about myself.

☆The first thing I learnt was about my personal limitations and dignity.

I work in a busy office, predominantly surrounded by females. As we all know, lots of women make a dynamite mix. A recipe of bitchy and competitive disaster. I am aware of the constant slandering of everybody. I choose not to involve myself. I choose to remain away from the poison. Unsurprisingly, I found myself involved anyhow. The usual situation, another colleague informs me slyly, ‘**** has been chatting about you’. I say this tongue in cheek, as I am not naive to not realise the double dose of bitchiness there. I sigh twice and shake my head, to symbolise the amusing irony of the situation. The fact is, I am pretty thick skinned. Secondly, I am under no false notion that everybody would like me. We are simply diverse for a reason. I may be one persons favourite palate. I may be another’s definitive helping of unwanted sprouts. Frankly, I remain nonplussed by this. Though I am also a woman, and I will never be a victim. So I addressed this within a work meeting, with an audience. Safe to say, I had the last laugh.

☆The second thing I learnt was that I am, in fact, not invinsible.

I haven’t felt well for a while. I suffer from pernicious anaemia and am undergoing further investigations for other symptoms. Unfortunately this means I have to endure stinging injections and blood tests. This week, I have particularly felt weak and tired. This week I have realised that I am not as self sufficient as I make out to be. When we feel ill, we do actually need the comfort and company of others. I spend my life relying upon myself. I’m in a caring role in my career, and as a single mum, it’s all down to me. I guess it’s time to admit that I cannot remain on form at all times. We all need something and someone.

☆The third thing I have realised is that some people will remain on the wrong path, regardless of positive intervention.

I love the medical joke;

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

It depends on when the light bulb is ready to change!

This fits everybody. Sometimes we simply need to accept that we do not have control over everything. Sometimes the only control we possess is to let it go, Sit back, and do nothing. Sometimes we simply have to hand back the reigns and let others deal with the consequences. It’s life. Never ending lesson.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Deeper I fall

Night is the time to ponder. I lay in the dark, only the light from my phone warming the chilled room. I think.

I do try not to think. Sometimes thought is simply exhausting. Sometimes, I would prefer to simply be. I am too deep for my own good at times. I analyse, I question. At work, that is a necessity. It is valued. I value it. At night, it is a hindrance. My body craves sleep. My mind craves stimulation.

There is no off switch.

So I surrender to the need. I drift off in a spiral of cognitive mass. It seeps into my dreams, it creates complex visioning.

It also creates a personal funneling to self awareness. The more we question our external world, the closer we become to our internal voice. To knowing our muse.

I know that the daylight will once again encourage the pondering and inquisitive notion. Dreams will become filed in my minds eye, for later analysis. A new day and a new conundrum will begin.

The irony is that we will never find the answers. The constant philosophical questions will forever remain a mystery. However, the inspiration will remain.

So I will sit. I will ponder. I will analyse. I will continue to use my brain creatively. I will continue to enjoy, question, enjoy some more. I will give my mind the stimulation it desires, and I will continue to learn.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Mothers (carers) Day! ♡

Happy mothers day to all you yummy mummy’s out there!

I also would like to mention the mums who also partake in the fatherly role, those mums who play the role of both parents. Not forgetting the single dad’s out there, you, too, are amazing! There are many people who parent a child, grandparents, foster parents, siblings, and family and friends – happy mothers day to you all too, without the selfless and continous devotion, our children wouldn’t have the opportunity to thrive.

We should all celebrate today. Each, and every one of us, has an impact and responsibility on nurturing the children of tomorrow. We are each creating a harmonious and happy world.

Children are miracles. They are a pure gift, and deserve to grow in a structured, secure, and happy environment.

We all need to feel proud.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Feed on life

‘Knowledge is the food of the soul’ Plato

Devour the learning. Taste the sweet dream. Immerse yourself in the nourishing soup of the soul. Remain hungry for growth and thirsty for wisdom.

Feed on life. Feast on development.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…

Snowy perception

I awoke to the snow.
As a child I loved snow, the cold softness of it as I stampeded through. The many imaginative games that stimulated my mind. The association to ‘fun’.

As an adult, this view has altered. My initial thought centres on the drive to work, the frosty windows and time consuming task of de-icing. I consider the pitfalls of slipping, and the bitter cold in my hands. The snow is close enough through my window.

Where and when did we lose our inner child? The child who awoke excited, and thought, without logic. The child who, would by now, be kitted out in welly boots and hat, ready to embrace the world of white.

Thought provoking. It is simply too early to ponder past that.

The mind of a deep thinker…or complete rubbish…it is all down to interpretation and perception…